I'm working on a memoir of identity, love, loss, and the power of choice.. A high school senior falls in love with her soulmate in 1984. By the time she suspects something is off, she is too entangled in an emotionally abusive relationship to believe herself and gradually fades away. This is her story of what happened, how it happened , and the transformation that powers her defection six years later . She reemerges as a strong young woman, but finds herslef unprepared for the daunting prospects of being alone and overwhelmed by feelings carefully filed away for years and falters . Her strength and resolve are tested to new limits and she learns she must go backwards before moving forward.
I also write personal narratives on recovery, sobriety, and my mother, Hurricane Gladys.
No one decides to enter an abusive relationship. It's not a choice we make but a slow, silent erosion of the self. By the time we can acknowledge there's a problem, we're trapped in a web of physical, economic, and psychological barriers.
Why didn't you leave? Is often the first question a survivor is asked. The burden of reason falls on the survivor and compounds the trauma. Ditch the question and lend an ear.
Anyone can be an advocate. We can start with this.
I believe you.
It's not your fault.
I'm sorry this happened to you.
Millions of women are scared, confused, rationalizing, and surviving with an abusive partner
Millions of women suspect their relationship has become unhealthy or abusive.
And millions more have been there and are trying to make sense of it all. Like me.
No one decides to become an alcoholic but physical/emotional and alcohol abuse go together like anxiety and depression (all inclusive package free with abuse history) It's a highly effective mechanism for long term avoidance, denial, and pain management.
I know. Turns out you can't run forever. For that I'm so grateful.
Thirty years ago, I ended a seven year relationship with a malignant narcissistic. I gave him my life and erased my own.
Three years ago, I talked about it for the first time.
Two years ago, I got sober.
Then healing began and continues.
Now, I advocate. And write.
2018 Idaho Writers Guild Contest winner
My essay Dying Alive won second in the non-fiction essay category
Member - NCADV, National Association of Memoir Writers, and Non Fiction Authors Association I